Chris Simon returns to the ice

Enforcer, strongman, misunderstood man-child and poet Chris Simon is back in the NHL after missing a few games for attempting to chop an opponents leg off with his skate.

Less than a week after returning to the Islanders Simon stole a Zamboni and used it to run over Pittsburgh Penguins winger Jarkko Ruutu, stating that he and Ruutu had “unfinished business”

Simon was assessed a match penalty for “intent to injure”.

In a press conference after the game Ted Nolan stated that he hopes Simon will receive support in this difficult time.

——————————————

* [Update] New information indicates that the red smear on the ice is in fact transmission fluid not Penguins RW Jarkko Ruutu. Simon, who was also not driving the Zamboni, is still at large in the NHL.